| What does it mean to be a Survivor? | | | | these things, especially "survivors" themselves. Maybe |
| Today, with good counseling and therapy, former | | | | they don't want to hear it because they're afraid |
| victims of childhood abuse are called "survivors." | | | | that by admitting these things, they're giving up on |
| Some people seem to think the fact that they're | | | | the idea of ever really healing or leading a productive |
| called survivors, means they're all healed and | | | | life. I believe the opposite is true, that it's actually |
| everything is perfectly fine now. This is not | | | | beneficial to the healing process. I think denying the |
| necessarily true. When a person, especially a child, has | | | | fact that there are lasting effects from having a |
| been abused, they definitely carry the scars for the | | | | whole portion of your life destroyed, is actually |
| rest of their lives. | | | | preventing any real healing to occur. |
| When a child is abused day after day, the whole | | | | Any time a person survives something traumatic, it's |
| experience of just being a child is lost. There's never | | | | within reason to expect that it will continue to have |
| any laughing or spontaneity, no giggling or acting silly, | | | | an effect for a very long time afterward. I survived |
| and never any cuddling or hugs. Just imagine what it | | | | a Category 5 hurricane and it definitely, has had a |
| must be like to not be able to act naturally, as a | | | | profound effect on my life. For years I suffered |
| normal child would, under any circumstance. This is | | | | from nightmares and, to this day, I still get nervous |
| what an abused child is faced with every single day | | | | when the wind kicks up or I hear loud thunder. I |
| of her life. | | | | know for a fact, surviving something as traumatic as |
| As she grows up, she really doesn't know what it is | | | | that, has changed a part of who I am. |
| to be "normal." What comes naturally to most people | | | | When a child has been abused, and had their whole |
| has to be learned, step by step. Her emotions and | | | | childhood taken away from them, there are definitely |
| even reactions to things never seem to be | | | | lasting effects. I know this for a fact because, not |
| appropriate, because as a child she was forbidden to | | | | only did I survive a hurricane, but I was also abused |
| express them. When she hears people talking about | | | | as a child. I know what denial does. For many years I |
| fond childhood memories she can't relate, because | | | | tried to pretend everything was normal and that |
| she has no fond memories. Every single day, there | | | | nothing was affecting me, but it didn't work. I always |
| seems to be something that reminds her of the big | | | | felt so torn apart, and it seemed the more I tried to |
| chunk of her life that's missing. | | | | fit in, the more I felt alienated. |
| Counseling helps, but a childhood abuse survivor is a | | | | It has only been a few years since I stopped |
| person whose whole perception "normal" was | | | | pretending and started to accept the fact that I still |
| distorted at an early age. Any psychologist will tell | | | | have to face the demons from my past now and |
| you that every stage of life, from infancy to | | | | then. They continue to rear their ugly heads now and |
| adulthood is vital to creating a well-balanced human | | | | then, but I'm much better able to deal with them |
| being. If one of those stages is interrupted or | | | | now. For me, accepting the fact that this is all a part |
| skipped completely, how can that person ever hope | | | | of who I am, has finally enabled me to become a |
| to be whole? | | | | whole person and a real survivor. |
| Most people don't seem to want to address or hear | | | | |