| Common thinking is that domestic violence is a | | | | abuse, but domestic abuse is really about control. And |
| "women's issue." While it is true there are more | | | | I don't think it matters whether the controlling party |
| reported abuse cases involving women, it is a fact | | | | is wearing pants or a skirt, whether he/she |
| that men are abused by their domestic partners as | | | | contributes as breadwinner or as housekeeper, or |
| well. | | | | whether this person deposits the checks or cashes |
| My belief is that there is indeed a gender factor | | | | them. |
| when we think of abuse in the "general sense." By | | | | Domestic violence is not bound by traditional male |
| general I mean all forms and manifestations of abuse: | | | | female stereotypes; rather it is a human obsessive |
| reckless conduct, competitive violent aggression, | | | | compulsion for control. One might even say it's a |
| abuse associated with lowered inhibitions, excessive | | | | psychosocial addiction to control. |
| stress reactivity, underdeveloped interpersonal | | | | Domestic Abuse Incidence to Men |
| communication skills, and the abusive conduct that | | | | In my consulting and psychotherapy practice, as well |
| can be a byproduct of drug-seeking behavior and the | | | | as in my life, I see almost as many men who are |
| like. | | | | victimized/battered by their female intimate partners |
| However, I do not believe there is as much a gender | | | | as women. (Studies show that nearly 40% of |
| factor when it comes to the abuse characteristic of | | | | domestic violence victims each year are men.) The |
| "intimate partner violence," (domestic abuse, spousal | | | | only difference I see between the abused man and |
| abuse, domestic violence) as it's defined in the | | | | the abused woman is the social politics surrounding |
| professional literature. With respect to this syndrome, | | | | their issues. |
| there is more of a "human factor" underlying its | | | | Seeing domestic violence beyond gender helps us |
| dynamics. | | | | identify the essence of battering behavior, that is the |
| The Real Factor | | | | larger context from which it unfolds. From here, we |
| It is a human factor that is fundamentally about | | | | are in a better position to act in our best interest. |
| control. Violence may be a manifestation of domestic | | | | |