Abusive Relationships - Why Do People Return to Their Abusive Relationship?

A common question people have about individuals inunderlying-and often unconscious-reasons domestic
abusive relationships is: why do they stay? A moreabuse survivors give their former relationship another
perplexing question to bystanders looking in is: whytry.
do they go back? And moreover, why do they goWhile one may certainly be aware of feelings that
back again and again and again?remain alive, hopes and dreams that sparkle, habits
It is estimated that a domestic abuse survivor willand customs of comfort, the operative motivator to
return to her abuser seven times before finallylet their exit go is often dissatisfaction with the
ending the relationship for good. What draws onealternative they have in the absence of the abusive
back into the same abusive relationship again andrelationship.
again?Safety Measures to Insure You Stick with Your Exit
Why They Return to Their Abusive RelationshipPlan
I would venture to say that many of the reasonsIf you are in an abusive relationship, look to create
people go back to the relationship are similar to thetwo plans: an immediate safety exit plan and a
reasons why they stay in the abusive relationship,long-term plan that you can see yourself transition
however with some slight differences.into over time. While in the crises mode of your initial
In working with thousands of people over the years,exit, you can see your transition circumstances as
I notice that the absence of a realistic and desirabletemporary. And you can then begin to visualize the
long-term living plan outside of the abusivemore long-standing plan you can and want to
relationship residence is one of the number onetransition into.