| If your home consists of one (or more) parent that | | | | He/she may even say those words in the same tone |
| batters, chances are higher that your children will | | | | and with the same demeanor as your spouse or |
| acquire the same tendency to be controlling and use | | | | ex-spouse. And moreover, he/she may even expect |
| battering to get their way. Now this doesn't mean | | | | you to respond to the use of his/her verbal abuse in |
| that all children of abusers become abusers, as they | | | | the very way that you responded to it when dished |
| may very well instead become victims in their adult | | | | out by the perpetrator-modeling parent. |
| intimate relationships instead. | | | | Your child may break things in the home exactly as |
| Fortunately, it is also true that one can choose to | | | | the abusive parent did, that is reaching for the same |
| over-compensate and end up highly sensitive to | | | | objects to fling or weapons of assault to use. And |
| battering as an adversity to avoid...thereby not | | | | further, he/she may very well expect the same |
| becoming an abuser or a victim. | | | | "privilege" of getting away with it. |
| Family Violence: Parent to Child | | | | So if you witness this inter-generational transmission |
| However, we know from decades of psychological | | | | of family abuse in your home, do not be surprised. |
| theory that it is clear that we acquire behavioral and | | | | And, most importantly, avoid establishing the same |
| "interactional" styles through modeling what we both | | | | dynamic with your abusive child that you had with |
| observe and experience. So it's not surprising when | | | | your abusive partner. |
| your latency stage, or adolescent, son or daughter | | | | The sooner you can get professional help for your |
| starts to call you the exact names that your | | | | battering offspring, the better. That is the better for |
| battering spouse used as household words of | | | | him/her, the better for you, and the better for any |
| degradation toward you. | | | | other children in your family. |