Leaving an Abusive Relationship - The Victim's Power After the Altercation

When is the best time to grab a victim out of anBut just outside and beyond that pain is a profound
abusive relationship? There are two points ofknowing that what just occurred is WRONG! And
intervention. That is, there are two times when shefrom here, the victim is shaken awake out from the
he is MOST amenable to leaving the abusiveconfusion of their abusive relationship.
relationship.She/he is shaken awake holding all of the power in
What are these times?the relationship. And in that moment of
1) Before she/he settles into the relationship andempowerment, she/he can truly see other options
becomes part of the dynamic, andfor her/himself.
2) Immediately after an altercation, whether verbalEmpowerment after the altercation
or physical.At the core of our being is a knowing that we are
The first is obvious. It's always easier to endwhole and we deserve to be honored as such, rather
something before it begins, right? That's why wethan broken down into pieces ...shattered into pieces,
say, prevention is the best cure.as we adapt to being an extension of another
The second may seem simple and obvious. However,overpowering us.
it is quite complex and not as clear to most people.If you are in an abusive relationship, stop and look at
Immediately after an altercation, the victim isthis moment of empowerment as your entry into
empowered! Now this may sound ridiculous, as sheyour exit from your abusive relationship. If you are a
he has just been victimized by the assault. Yes, thisfriend or family of someone in an abusive relationship,
is true and assault does hurt. There's no questionrecognize this is your best point of intervention.
about that.