Three Words to Live By - I Love You

In good parenting there are three magic words toexperience consequences, but they also always need
live by: I love you. Saying these words over and overto know that you still love them. This does not
again is very important to get you through the hardbelittle the impact of the lesson, but rather cements
times and to get your children over the hurdles in life.the message that you are not punishing them out of
Many times parents do not realize the stronganger, hate or impatience. Though your children may
influence of these words. Children who grow upnot want to hear it, you are doing it for their own
never hearing them can end up bitter and may havegood to teach them the difference between right
very difficult relationship problems, including but notand wrong. It may feel unrewarding to hear your
limited to an inability to say the words themselves.child's anger at something you did out of love, but
Even if you know that your children know you loverest easy knowing that one day they will thank you
them, continue to remind them, even when yourfor it, even if it is not until they have children of their
children become teenagers. They may not respondown.
to it or even seem to care that you are saying it,Even when your children are doing things you don't
but the words are sticking.like, respect them and love them. When your
Saying "I love you" is only half the battle. You alsodaughter wears too much makeup or your son gets
have to show "I love you." A kiss, a hug, a smallhis nose pierced, continue to show them that you
sacrifice or a small favor may be all that it takes tolove who they are, even if you do not always
show that you mean these words. It may seemapprove of their fashion choices. It is important to be
simple, but there are times in life when this will takesupportive of your children as they try to discover
incredible patience, time and unfaltering dedication andwho they are and who they will become. It is not
sacrifice to follow through.worth arguing over things that hold little significance,
Sometimes love means saying no. You feel anbecause you will need that strength later to fight
obligation to protect your child from harm, and if thatover real issues that affect your child's well-being.
means preventing your child from doing some of theThere are a lot of disappointments that your children
things he or she wants to do, then so be it. Life canwill have to bear throughout their lifetimes; do not let
be dangerous and unpredictable. Saying no is a signyour love be one of them. Letting your children know
that you will accept your children's anger in exchangethat you love them could end up being their one ray
for your comfort that they are safe and for theof hope during the dark times in their lives. No matter
knowledge that they are likely to be healthier in thewhat goes wrong or how bad things seem they will
long run. Their anger will not last for long but thealways know that they have the love and support of
good that comes from saying no will impact the kindtheir family to fall back on. Let this love guide them
of people they turn out to be.through the best and worst of times.
When your children misbehave, they need to