| During my most recent trip to the East coast | | | | cumbersome and difficult to engage without an |
| of South Florida, which turned out to be much | | | | attorney and something as simple as |
| lengthier than anticipated, I knew before | | | | transferring title to a vehicle can become |
| hand there would be much to loath and | | | | arduous. However, there are plenty of |
| probably more to fear. I was not disappointed | | | | attorneys to choose from since Florida state |
| on either account.Upon arriving at the Ft. | | | | motto could well be "I'll Sue You. One uses a |
| Lauderdale International Airport, I purchased | | | | shopping cart at his or her own legal peril |
| a copy of the Miami Herald and immediately | | | | while shopping for groceries at Winn Dixie, |
| sensed fear, for I read that Governor Jeb | | | | particularly on the days following a |
| Bush was about to sign a bill just that week | | | | hurricane when water is in short supply. It's |
| that would become known as the "Stand Your | | | | helpful, of course, to be Tri-lingual, that |
| Ground" law. The law immunizes citizens who | | | | is, fluent in English, Spanish, and New York. |
| use deadly force in self-defense against | | | | That I was fluent in only the first two did |
| criminal prosecution and civil liability. | | | | not make my stay any easier.Florida weather |
| Quickly realizing that under this "Shoot | | | | can be treacherous in its unpredictability. |
| First" law, as long as the shooter "is not | | | | Heavy rain storms suddenly pop up while the |
| engaged in unlawful activity" and is | | | | sky is blue and then disappear just as |
| "attacked in any other place where he or she | | | | quickly. This, of course, adds to one's |
| has a right to be" the shooter has the right | | | | driving pleasure, especially while the lane |
| to use deadly force. Thus , if a fist fight | | | | jumpers are perpetrating their madness. |
| escalates to lethal violence, the shooter | | | | Speaking of weather, what would a visit to |
| could receive immunity under the law even if | | | | Florida be without at least the threat of a |
| he initiated the confrontation, as long as he | | | | tropical storm or hurricane. Hurricanes are |
| "reasonably believed" that shooting a gun was | | | | not romantic.They are nasty, scary and equal |
| necessary to prevent "great bodily harm" to | | | | opportunity renderers of severe damage, not |
| himself. Needless to say, even before I drove | | | | only from wind and water, but from the after |
| out of the parking lot, I swore to myself | | | | effects of being without power for weeks. |
| that I would be on my very best behavior and | | | | Indeed, the subtle ripple effects of these |
| look straight ahead even after being insulted | | | | storms are just plain awful and too numerous |
| or otherwise abused during any road rage | | | | to describe in this piece. Yet, to cushion |
| incidents....which, in Florida, are virtually | | | | the discomfort, there are thousands of little |
| impossible to avoid. Cautiously glancing at | | | | acts of kindness that neighbors do for each |
| the faces of some of the drivers while | | | | other that are so very wonderful and tender. |
| driving north on dangerous 95 brought to mind | | | | During the aftermath of the hurricane that |
| Jack Nicholson in the Shining.Now don't get | | | | blew directly over Delray Beach (though not |
| me wrong. I'm no shrinking violet, and NH | | | | my first experience with one), the fact I was |
| Senate Bill 318, recently introduced by | | | | able to make instant coffee and cook soup |
| Senator Peter Bragdon, R-Amherst, if passed, | | | | with sterno made me quite popular in my condo |
| will thankfully bring NH law more in line | | | | complex. Meanwhile, someone named "Boyardee" |
| with that of Florida......and that's a good | | | | quickly became the most famous chef in Palm |
| thing since no person should face the | | | | Beach County.To this day, I cannot fathom why |
| possibility of prison time for standing up to | | | | people waited in two-mile long lines to get |
| an attacker. But present NH law does just | | | | ice. Why? What did they do with it? Martinis, |
| that. It states that deadly force used in | | | | medicine, food? No one seemed to know the |
| self-defense outside of one's own property is | | | | answer but people still waited in |
| not justified if one can, with completee | | | | long.......and I mean long..........lines |
| safety, retreat from the situation or | | | | which were supervised by heavily armed |
| surrender property to which the aggressor | | | | members of the Florida National Guard even |
| claims a right. So, if faced with a car | | | | though those waiting appeared to pose no |
| jacker in, say, Wal-Mart's parking lot, let | | | | threat given their frailty and median age. |
| him drive off with your pickup. In our "Live | | | | Meanwhile, burly State Troopers and local |
| Free or Die" state, crime victims are at an | | | | police directed traffic and did a superb job |
| disadvantage while a crime is being | | | | though some of the high speed collisions at |
| committeed. If Governor John Lynch does the | | | | unprotected intersections during the evening |
| right thing, this is about to changeOnce | | | | hours were almost surreal in their |
| safely ensconced in the family condo in | | | | spectacularity.But for sheer fear, nothing |
| Delray Beach, I received recorded non-stop | | | | topped waiting in long lines at service |
| phone messages from just about every scamster | | | | stations for gas (at those stations smart |
| in the state with just about every illicit | | | | enough to have generators) where the |
| idea imaginable. A particularly despicable | | | | attendants wore holsters packed with |
| one asked if my brother had passed away yet. | | | | lethal-looking weapons. Combining this with |
| He was "offering assistance during this time | | | | the new "shoot first" law, the fact that |
| of grief." In Florida, these are apparently | | | | being able to shower with safe and warm water |
| known as obituary predators. After scores of | | | | was a luxury long forgotten, being in slow |
| other calls, it became clear just how | | | | and long lines with hot tempered, |
| vulnerable the elderly and/or the lonely | | | | ill-mannered and dangerous looking people, |
| might be in this state, and how helpless they | | | | and doing all this while toting up the costs |
| are to do much about it. This is loathsome, | | | | incurred by a damaging hurricane, and finally |
| indeed.But getting back to road rage, Florida | | | | reeling from daily customer service that |
| does not have a turning signal law so lane | | | | seemed to go out of its way to be |
| jumping is commonplace. In fact, many | | | | aggressively offensive and would better be |
| multiple lane jumpers have it down to an art | | | | termed "customer abuse" ..........all this |
| form...........perpendicular finger and all. | | | | presented a supreme test of one's will.I did |
| And I am not just talking about driving | | | | make many solid and lasting friends during my |
| around some protected enclave like Route 1 | | | | stay in Delray Beach and Palm Beach County, |
| through Palm Beach or Boca Raton or on the | | | | particularly during the storm. Most were from |
| other side of the state. No, I'm talking | | | | other states since a Florida native along |
| about driving south on 441 toward Plantation | | | | this part of the East coast is about as rare |
| or on treacherous 95 toward Wilton Manors or | | | | as a manatee. But I was truly elated when it |
| in and around West Palm Beach or Miami proper | | | | came time to finally return home to my wife, |
| where returning an insult can lead to | | | | dog, friends and home in good old North |
| something sudden and serious. When you | | | | Conway, New Hampshire......a place the |
| combine this with the new "Stand Your Ground" | | | | overall pleasantness of which should never be |
| law, you have something that can only be | | | | taken for granted.A limo took me to the Ft. |
| described as toxic alchemy.On one sunny | | | | Lauderdale Airport for an agreed upon price |
| morning while driving south on 441 toward | | | | of $ 70. Upon arriving, I handed the driver a |
| Margate, I suddenly noticed that cars were | | | | one hundred dollar bill and pleasantly said |
| swerving to the left and right of center, | | | | "please give me back $10" whereupon he |
| some going on the shoulder. Finally, I saw | | | | replied he did not have any change |
| what the cause was. A smiling George Burns | | | | (apparently, a near 30% tip was not enough |
| look-alike, cigar and all, was driving his | | | | for him). Little did the poor guy know I was |
| golf cart down the center of the road in the | | | | hep to his scam and that my frustrations had |
| wrong direction. Hardly believing my eyes, I | | | | been building for weeks. He simply gave me |
| quickly swerved to the shoulder and let the | | | | the excuse I was looking for...........but |
| fellow geezer pass. I never found out what | | | | that's another matter."The best remedy for |
| happened to him or how he found his way onto | | | | those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to |
| a major highway but I had a funny feeling the | | | | go outside, somewhere where they can be |
| incident was not all that unusual. Fear and | | | | quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and |
| loathing? No. Amusing? Oh God, yes! | | | | God. Because only then does one feel that all |
| Dangerous? Most definitely.On the positive | | | | is as it should be and that God wishes to see |
| side and given its population of retirees, | | | | people happy, amidst the simple beauty of |
| Florida does have a fantastic network of | | | | nature." Anne FrankTed Sares, PhD, is a |
| medical care facilities running from | | | | private investor who lives and writes in the |
| out-patient care to hospice and everything in | | | | White Mountain area of Northern New Hampshire |
| between. The medical teams in Florida are | | | | with his wife Holly and Min Pin Jackdog. He |
| simply incredible and if one has to take ill, | | | | writes a weekly column for a local newspaper |
| this is one of the better states in which to | | | | and many of his other pieces are widely |
| do it. Conversely, the governmental | | | | published. |
| bureaucracy in Florida is extremely | | | | |