No One in the Family Escapes

Families do not communicate primarily by language.wouldn't care. They have turned off all emotion to
That might surprise you, until you consider thatavoid the pain of walking on eggshells. One piece of
humans bonded in families for millennia before weresearch on children in abusive families might startle
even had language. Even today, the most sensitiveyou. Witnessing a parent victimized is usually more
communications that have the most far-reachingpsychologically damaging to children than injuries from
consequences to our lives occur between parentsdirect child abuse. In my own family, that was
and infants through tone of voice, facial expressions,certainly true. I have only the faintest memories of
touch, smell, and body posture, not language. Thoughchild abuse - a small hole in my skull and a
less obvious than interactions with young children,knocked-out front tooth - but I have vivid
most of your communications with your older childrennightmares of seeing my mother ignored and
and with your husband also occur through andismissed as well as demeaned and terrified. Seeing a
unconscious process of emotional attunement. Youparent abused is the more profound form of child
psychologically and even physically tune in yourabuse. When it comes to the more severe forms of
emotions to the people you love. That's how you candestructiveness, purely emotional abuse is usually
come home in one mood, find your husband ormore psychologically harmful than physical abuse.
children in a different mood and, bam! - all of aThere are a couple of reasons for this. Even in the
sudden, out of nowhere, you're in their mood. Quitemost violent families, the incidents tend to be cyclical.
unconsciously, you automatically react to oneEarly in the abuse cycle, a violent outburst is followed
another. Emotional attunement, not verbal skills,by a honeymoon period of remorse, attention,
determines how we communicate, from our choiceaffection, and generosity, but not genuine
of words to our tone of voice. If attuned to acompassion. (The honeymoon stage eventually ends,
positive mood, you are likely to communicateas the victim begins to say, "Never mind the damn
pleasantly. If you're in a negative mood, your wordsflowers, just stop hitting me!") Emotional abuse, on
will be less than pleasant. Now here's the really badthe other hand, tends to happen every day. So the
news. Due to this unconscious, automatic process ofeffects are more harmful because they're so
emotional attunement, your children are painfullyfrequent. The other factor that makes emotional
reactive to the walking-on-eggshells atmosphereabuse so devastating is the greater likelihood that
between your husband and you, even if they nevervictims will blame themselves. If someone hits you,
hear you say a harsh word to one another. Everyoneit's easier to see that he or she is the problem, but if
in a walking-on-eggshells family loses some degree ofthe abuse is subtle - saying or implying that you're
dignity and autonomy. You become unable to decideugly, a bad parent, stupid, incompetent, not worth
your own thoughts, feelings, and behavior, becauseattention, or that no one could love you - you are
you are living in a defensive-reactive pattern thatmore likely to think it's your problem. All Forms of
runs largely on automatic pilot. No fewer than half theAbuse Have in Common a Failure of Compassion
members of these unfortunate families, including theWhether overt or silent, all forms of abuse are
children, suffer from clinical anxiety and/or depression.failures of compassion; he stops caring about how
("Clinical" doesn't mean feeling down or blue oryou feel. Compassion is the lifeblood of families and
worried, it means that the symptoms interfere withfailure of compassion is the "heart disease" of a
normal functioning. You can't sleep, can't concentrate,family's emotional life. It actually would be less hurtful
can't work as efficiently, and can't enjoy yourselfif your husband never cared about how you feel. But
without drinking.) Most of the adults lack genuinewhen you were falling in love, he cared a great deal,
self-esteem (based on realistic self-appraisals), andso now it feels like betrayal when he doesn't care or
the children rarely feel as good as other kids. Theytry to understand. You feel as if he's not the person
are ten times more likely to grow up to be resentful,you married. It may not seem it from your
angry, or abusive adults. If the family is violent,day-to-day interactions, but your husband probably
children are ten times more like to become abusersloves you. His emotional reactivity indicates that a
or victims of violence as adults. They are also atstrong bond still stirs the guilt and shame that,
increased risk of alcoholism, criminality, mental healthtragically, he blames on you. The fact that he loves
problems, and poverty. The most common symptomyou is both good news and bad news. Love by itself
of children in families who walk on eggshells isis so focused on how we feel that it masks the
depression. But the signs can fool you; childhooddifferences between people. The very intensity of
depression looks different from the weeping,love can make the person you love seem like little
withdrawn, or sullen adult version. In children themore than a source of strong emotions. In other
disorder resembles chronic boredom. Children normallywords, it seems to him that you cause his emotions.
have high levels of interest, enjoyment, andIf he feels good, you're on a pedestal; but if he feels
excitement. If your child is not interested in thebad, you're a demon. Compassion makes us sensitive
things in which children are normally interested, lacksto the individual strengths and vulnerabilities of other
enthusiasm, and is seldom excited, he or she ispeople. As he learns to feel compassion under stress,
probably depressed. Another common symptom ofyour husband will see that you are different from
these children is anxiety, particularly worry abouthim, with your own temperament, sensibility,
things that children do not normally worry about, likeexperiences, longings, hopes, and dreams - all of
how their parents are going to get through thewhich he probably did see when you were falling in
evening with each other. Many kids have schoollove and his level of compassion was naturally high.
problems, show aggressive tendencies, hyperactivity,Love by itself buries differences in the shadows of
and either over-emotionality -- anger, excitability, orhow strongly we feel. Compassion shines light on our
frequent crying that seem to come out of nowheredifferences and lets us appreciate and sympathize
-- or the polar opposite: no emotions at all. In thewith loved ones. Love without the sensitivity of
latter condition, they can look like little stone children;compassion is: rejecting (of who you really are as a
you could slice up a puppy in front of them and theyperson), possessive, controlling, and dangerous.