| PART 1: Warning - This article may be
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| | justice... I did nothing to cause the
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| inappropriate for younger readers. Please
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| | abuse - it wasn't my fault. However, I
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| seek the permission of a parent or
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| | was responsible for my refusal to forgive
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| guardian before reading further.Lately,
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| | and my willingness to hate and harm
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| I'm hearing a lot about suicide or
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| | rather than to love using healthy
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| suicide attempts. It's becoming
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| | boundaries. I was wrong for judging all
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| increasingly clear to me, however, that
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| | people as evil because of the crimes of a
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| what I'm hearing about even more often is
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| | few. Refusing to forgive, to accept and
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| childhood sexual abuse.It's
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| | receive love and to constructively deal
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| everywhere.Some might say this epidemic
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| | with my anger and fear was hurting me,
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| of childhood sexual abuse is another
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| | not my abusers. I had to stop running
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| "sign of the Apocalypse." After all, the
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| | from my longings for loving
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| Scriptures declare: "...in the last days
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| | relationships.This realization sent me
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| perilous times shall come. For men shall
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| | into a fierce battle - a matter of life
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| be lovers of their own selves, covetous,
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| | and death. I felt I was teetering on the
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| boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient
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| | ledge of sanity versus insanity by the
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| to parents, unthankful, unholy, without
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| | tips of my fingers, my body dangling
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| natural affection, trucebreakers, false
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| | above the abyss of despair. I was afraid
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| accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers
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| | of change, but even more afraid of the
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| of those that are good, traitors, heady,
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| | pain I carried. But I didn't try to hide
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| highminded, lovers of pleasures more than
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| | from the truth this time.I understood the
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| lovers of God; having a form of
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| | abuse was so invasive it would be a
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| godliness, but denying the power thereof:
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| | lifelong recovery process. Just the
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| from such turn away," (2 Timothy 3:1-5).
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| | thought of letting go of the anger and
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| Hmmm...lovers of selves...disobedient to
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| | the grief was hard to bear so I
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| parents...without natural
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| | prayed...Eventually, God eliminated the
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| affection...lovers of pleasure...they may
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| | pain from my past, but I'm yet learning
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| even have a form of godliness. Wow.
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| | to deal with the present, which is
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| Certainly, with Satan's track record for
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| | strongly influenced by my past.DEFINING
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| hating and murdering children throughout
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| | CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSEHere's one
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| history, it's a pretty good guess that he
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| | appropriate definition: "Any sexual
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| could have his hand in this current
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| | activity initiated by a peer or adult
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| epidemic, too.Epidemic? Perhaps. Based on
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| | without consent is abuse, including
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| reported cases, US Justice Department
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| | physical, visual or verbal stimuli." As a
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| statistics reveal that one in every four
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| | rule of thumb, it's when a person invades
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| girls and one in every six boys (2.78
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| | the physical or psychological realm of a
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| million guys) will be sexually abused
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| | child or touches them sexually. This
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| before the age of eighteen.JESUS: LORD OF
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| | invasion results in the child suffering
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| THE SEXUAL PREDATORS?The media is filled
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| | physical and/or psychological damage.I
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| with stories about childhood sexual abuse
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| | talked with the father of three young
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| involving everyone from ministers to
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| | daughters who, after viewing a
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| siblings. Just this morning, a headline
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| | pornographic video while his girls were
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| screamed that an Abilene minister was
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| | sleeping, hit 'rewind' and went to bed.
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| sentenced for sexually abusing a foster
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| | He was horrified the next morning as he
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| child. Though most Christians will likely
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| | walked in on his innocent little girls,
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| find quite appalling the stories and
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| | still in their pajamas, huddled around
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| statistics I've recently been pouring
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| | the TV, eating Lucky Charms, watching
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| over, one thing we cannot forget - one
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| | daddy's erotic film. Twenty years later,
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| thing that we absolutely MUST bear in
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| | the girls have had multitudes of
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| mind - is that Jesus died for sex
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| | unnecessary personal, sexual and
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| offenders, too.I know. I know. I cringed
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| | relational burdens to bear, including
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| as I was reminded of that fact. I recall
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| | teen pregnancy and other psychological
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| a man angrily declaring, "I hope there's
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| | issues. Granted, they may have wound up
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| an exceedingly hot place in Hell for
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| | that way anyway, but as I relay that
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| child abusers!" Even within our prisons,
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| | story to you, I cannot help but wonder if
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| child sex offenders are looked upon as
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| | we, as a society, aren't just as guilty
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| being the worst of the worst. But let's
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| | of the sexual abuse of our nation's
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| remember, in most cases, child abusers
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| | children as we expose them to all sorts
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| were once sexually molested, precious
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| | of off-color, even blatantly sexual
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| little children, too.The cycle must be
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| | examples from the immodest fashions of
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| broken.I firmly believe that there are
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| | pop-singers to adult sit-coms and sexual
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| some God-fearing Christians reading this
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| | content in films and printed subject
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| right now who are struggling with
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| | matter. Children should not have to try
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| personally sexually abusing children and
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| | and process the garbage we feed them by
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| that he - or she (about 60% of male
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| | way of the media. We adults are having a
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| survivors report at least one of their
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| | hard enough time processing all the junk
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| perpetrators was/is female) - needs to
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| | we're exposed to.Many people don't
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| know that God loves them with an
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| | realize that they have, in actuality - by
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| everlasting love and NOTHING can separate
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| | definition - been sexually abused. See,
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| them from that love.
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| | the term 'sexual abuse' encompasses a
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| Jesus is the way out. Friends, you CAN
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| | wide variety of inappropriate actions
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| get help. Your life is a struggle and
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| | from so-called "victimless" crimes like
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| you've known all along that something
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| | voyeurism and indecent exposure, to child
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| just wasn't "right" in your life. Let's
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| | molestation, incest and rape. Voyeurism
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| deal with it. NOW! There's a reason why
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| | and indecent exposure are often "gateway
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| every one of us is the way we are. We are
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| | crimes" that can start an offender down
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| receptacles but yours is NOT an
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| | the path to more serious action.Here's a
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| insurmountable problem. In the same way
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| | myth-buster: Contrary to popular belief,
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| your problem has gotten gradually worse,
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| | the perpetrators of sex offenses are NOT
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| it really CAN get better.In addition, I
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| | acting out of sexual desires; their
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| am certain that there are scores of
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| | primary motive is simply POWER. Child
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| readers who were victims of childhood
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| | abusers may become so demonically
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| sexual abuse. You need to know that there
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| | oppressed that they give way to a
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| is no shame. You are not guilty. You are
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| | stronghold and begin to seek domination -
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| not "damaged goods" and God desires to
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| | CONTROL - over others who are easy prey.
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| empower you and use the story of your
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| | When one abusive act fails to satisfy,
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| life to encourage many, many others who
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| | they find themselves wanting more. The
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| have believed the devil's lies. There is
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| | acts can often become so dangerous that
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| an army just like you - an army looking
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| | nothing short of taking a human life will
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| for leadership - who needs to know the
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| | stop the urge. To sex offenders, victims
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| way out. Jesus is the WAY, working
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| | are not seen as being real people, but as
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| through you. Lead them out, back onto the
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| | OBJECTS to be dominated.A MAJOR SOCIAL
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| battlefield where you can all make a
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| | ISSUEHow pervasive is sexual abuse of
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| difference as wounded, yet overcoming,
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| | children? It's estimated that there are
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| soldiers. The planet is covered with
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| | 60 million child rape survivors in the
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| people like you who need help. Go on and
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| | USA today. Children with disabilities are
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| break the cycle. Yes, YOU!To those who
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| | 4 to 10 times more vulnerable to sexual
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| are neither sex offenders (who may even
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| | abuse than their non-disabled peers
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| disdain those who commit these acts), or
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| | (Source: National Resource Center on
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| victims of childhood sexual abuse (who
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| | Child Sexual Abuse, 1992). Long term
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| cannot relate to the emotional suffering
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| | effects of child abuse include fear,
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| they are experiencing that is impacting
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| | anxiety, depression, anger, hostility,
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| virtually every other aspect of their
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| | inappropriate sexual behavior, poor self
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| lives), I ask that you read this article,
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| | esteem, tendency toward substance abuse
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| gather the facts, and ask that God would
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| | and difficulty with close relationships.
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| break your heart for both the abusers and
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| | (Source: Browne & Finkelhor,
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| the abused. This issue DOES involve
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| | 1986).Adolescents with a history of
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| you.According to Ephesians Chapter 6 in
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| | sexual abuse are significantly more
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| the Holy Bible, our battle is NEVER
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| | likely than their counterparts to engage
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| against people, but against demonic
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| | in sexual behavior that puts them at risk
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| forces at work in people's lives. We must
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| | for HIV infection, according to Dr. Larry
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| see those who hurt people as hurting
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| | K. Brown, Rhode Island Hospital.
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| people. Let us perceive them as we would
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| | According to Dr. Brown, "These results
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| a child playing on a playground,
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| | suggest two things. Abused kids need
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| oblivious to the rabid dog approaching.
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| | adequate counseling around abuse issues.
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| Do we get angry at the child or run to
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| | A lot of these kids keep re-experiencing
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| their defense with prayer, encouragement
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| | the anxiety and trauma for years." The
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| and counsel?WHAT ONE SURVIVOR SAYSHere's
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| | second issue, he said, is that "most
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| what one survivor of childhood sexual
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| | therapy does not address current sexual
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| abuse had to say about her journey toward
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| | behavior" and the anxieties that sexually
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| victory after being abused by a minister
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| | abused adolescents experience. (Source:
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| in her church: ...abuse touched every
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| | Larry K. Brown, M.D., et al, American
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| aspect of my life - emotional, physical,
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| | Journal of Psychiatry 2000).Did you know
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| relational and spiritual. I lived with a
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| | that, among both adolescent girls and
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| victim mentality for over thirty years
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| | boys, a history of sexual or physical
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| until I learned to be a survivor.I was
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| | abuse appears to increase the risk of
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| angry with everyone, and afraid to trust
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| | eating disorders? Abused girls were more
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| anyone. Shame and guilt became my
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| | dissatisfied with their weight and more
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| constant companions, convincing me that I
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| | likely to diet and purge their food by
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| somehow encouraged the abusers' advances.
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| | vomiting or using laxatives and
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| I built protective barriers to avoid
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| | diuretics. These girls were also more
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| loving and being loved.It seemed as
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| | likely to restrict their eating when they
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| though my body defied me by bringing
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| | were bored or emotionally upset. This
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| unsolicited sexual advances, thus
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| | finding suggests that abused girls might
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| becoming my own worst enemy. I took
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| | experience higher levels of emotional
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| revenge against my body, forcing it to
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| | distress, possibly linked to their abuse,
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| make restitution for its disloyalty as I
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| | and have trouble coping. Food restriction
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| smoked, drank, and over-ate my way to
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| | and perhaps other eating disorder
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| false comfort.Because adults betrayed and
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| | behaviors may (reflect) efforts to cope
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| humiliated me, I became rebellious,
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| | with such experiences. (Source: Stephen
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| refusing to submit to authority. I kept
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| | A. Wonderlich, M.D., et al, University of
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| intimate relationships at bay for fear
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| | North Dakota School of Medicine and
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| someone I cared about would learn my
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| | Health Sciences in Fargo, Journal of the
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| secret.Because some of my abusers were
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| | American Academy of Child and Adolescent
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| "upstanding" members in the church
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| | Psychiatry 2000).PART 2 on this subject
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| clergy, I couldn't trust a God who seemed
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| | is available to anyone who is interested.
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| indifferent to my suffering and who
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| | Simply hit REPLY and type ABUSE in the
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| allowed adults to abuse me. I was afraid
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| | SUBJECT BAR.Love one another.Every
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| of that kind of love, so I rejected God
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| | blessing!Michael
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| and the counsel of the church.I suffered
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| | A servant of God
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| silently for more than thirty years
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| | t.e.a.m. ministries
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| before it became imperative that I face
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| | A Message of Discipleship &
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| the issues of sexual abuse in my life. I
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| | Encouragement to the Body of Christ
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| couldn't carry the burden and pain alone.
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| | P.O. Box 633
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| I had to face the past, deal with the
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| | Stephenville, Texas 76401
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| hurts and learn to live in the present.
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| |
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| The "protective tools" I selected as a
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| | BLOG: Michael has been broadcasting
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| twelve-year old abused child - anger,
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| | his eMail messages of Discipleship and
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| bitterness and refusal to forgive -
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| | encouragement to Christians of all
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| caused me more pain rather than relief,
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| | denominations
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| since I longed for love, acceptance and
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| | since 1999. These messages are literally
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| affirmation.I didn't want to forgive,
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| | reaching millions each week and the
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| however, because forgiving my abusers
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| | messages are being re-posted on other
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| seemed to reduce the significance of the
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| | Christian sites,used as Bible studies for
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| crime and their need for punishment...I
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| | groups, and are being used by those in
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| felt warranted in my desire for
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| | ministry as a preaching guide.
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