| Abuse of any kind is difficult to deal | | | | One way to deal with the situation |
| with. Types of verbal abuse can include | | | | before it becomes a big problem is to |
| the following: | | | | try humor. You cannot control how your |
| - Does your loved one ignore your | | | | loved one is acting but you can decrease |
| feelings? | | | | the feelings of frustration by |
| - Is he disrespectful? | | | | controlling how you respond. Try to |
| - Does he withhold approval, | | | | validate your loved one's feelings; it |
| appreciation or affection? | | | | will definitely help him. Many times, |
| - Does he walk away without answering | | | | people with Alzheimer's are so |
| you? | | | | frustrated that they act it out through |
| - Does he criticize you, call you names | | | | verbal abuse and aggression. Put |
| or yell at you? | | | | yourself in his place. It is very |
| - Does he humiliate you in public or in | | | | frustrating! |
| the privacy of your home? | | | | The most important thing you have to |
| - Does he tell you that you are too | | | | remember is not to talk "down" to your |
| sensitive? | | | | loved one because he is still a person |
| - Does he destroy furniture or punch | | | | with an entire life history of success |
| holes in the walls? | | | | and independence. If you see that what |
| These are some of the signs, but there | | | | you are trying to do or say to him is |
| are many more that may be observed. | | | | not working, just let it go for a while, |
| Abuse is difficult to deal with if the | | | | step out of the room and come back |
| abuser has Alzheimer's disease since the | | | | later. Let your loved one calm down and |
| abuser can't really control it. | | | | relax. You may want to try music. |
| If a person with Alzheimer's becomes | | | | Studies have shown that Alzheimer's |
| verbally abusive, it may be because he | | | | patients often find music relaxing. |
| is suffering from depression or | | | | Finally, if you still feel overwhelmed, |
| aggressive behavior caused by the | | | | join a support group that specifically |
| disease. In this case you might want to | | | | deals with verbal abuse and learn how to |
| involve your doctor and let him know the | | | | cope with it. Many times other people in |
| situation. He may be able to prescribe | | | | the group will have experienced the same |
| an anti-depressive medication or simply | | | | ordeal with their loved ones. Group |
| change the current medication. You may | | | | members may be able to counsel you on |
| want to take a break from your loved | | | | how they coped or dealt with this kind |
| one, as sometimes caring all the time | | | | of behavior. |
| for the same person can be exhausting. | | | | This group will also help you to deal |
| Or you can try to place your loved one | | | | with your emotions and frustrations. |
| in an adult day care, or hire some | | | | They will tell you how to control them, |
| professional help. Make sure that | | | | and once you are able to deal with your |
| substitute caregivers are knowledgeable | | | | own feelings, then you will be more |
| about Alzheimer's disease and know how | | | | effective coping with your loved one's |
| to handle patients with dementia. | | | | behavior. |